Weight of the World
by resident vampire
Summary: Max has had a hard life. Sometimes the stress just boils over.


A/N: Hey, Resident Vampire here. So yeah, I'm totally in the mood for writing songfics for Max Ride using Evanescence songs. Has anybody else noticed that a bunch of Evanescence's songs go with Max Ride, as well as Twilight? It's pretty cool, if you ask me. So, yeah. I'm gonna shut up and let you read the story now.

Disclaimer: I want to own it. So, obviously, if I _want _to own it, I don't. Darn.

Weight of the World

The flock and I flew to a cave in the middle of nowhere. It was good for us, seeing as how it was several hundred feet off the ground. And large. The entire flock could fit into it with ease. We would be staying here tonight, so we built a fire and got some food going. While the others played a game of cards with a deck that Gazzy had stolen, I sat at the entrance to the cave, my feet dangling over the edge.

My life was so stressful. From the age of ten, I had to raise three young kids, feed everybody else, as well as said kids, and make sure that we had a place to stay. Fang and Iggy helped some, but they're guys. Not exactly compatible with the whole clean thing.

_Feels like the weight of the world_

_L__ike God in heaven gave me a turn_

_D__on't cling to me, I swear I fix you _

_S__till in the dark, can you fix me?_

I wish there was some way to get away from all this responsibility. Don't get me wrong, I love the flock. I really do. But I just don't ever seem to get the work done. Now that we don't have a house, my work is harder. Sometimes, it's just so tempting to just tuck my wings in and fall.

_Freefall, freefall, all through life_

But of course I won't. I owe too much to the others to do that to them. I swore one day that I would keep them out of those cages. And I will. I would never put any of them back in that situation. Not Fang, not Iggy, not Nudge, Gazzy, or Angel. None of them. Hell, I wouldn't even make Total go back to the School. But that's not the point. I wish that I could go to some island with them. Once there, I would make sure they were safe, then go to the other side of the island, and have my peace. It would be so cool to go.

_If you love me, then let go of me_

_I won__'t be held down by who I used to be_

_S__he's nothing to me_

I could say, "Ok, guys, let's go." Fang was supposed to be working on the deserted island option for us, but computer use was scanty at the moment. I knew that the flock loved me, but I wanted to let this self go. This self, which was so totally absorbed with others, never gave me any peace. I didn't want to be held down by it anymore. But I knew that I always would be. I accepted that, but I didn't have to like it. Maybe if Fang took care of the kids for just one day…

_Feels like the weight of the world_

_L__ike all my screaming has gone unheard_

_A__nd oh, I know you don't believe in me_

_S__afe in the dark, how can you see?_

The weight of the world is on my shoulders. At least, it feels like it. I am supposed to save the world somehow. 'Why me?' seems to be my favorite question these days. I know that some people believe that I can't do it. They've kept themselves in the dark about real life, so how can they expect to judge me?

_Freefall, freefall, all through life_

The only real joy I get in life is flying. That and being with the flock. You should join me sometime, flying up in the air, feeling the cold wind push your hair back and making you feel so alive. And then you go into a dive, and it's so amazing. Try it sometime.

_If you love me, then let go of me_

_I won__'t be held down by who I used to be_

That island's starting to look really good right now. But really. If only there was someone to come up and put an arm around me, and really care. _That _would be great.

"Max?" Fang's voice interrupted my musing. I looked up to see him headed over to me with some food hot off the fire. He sat down, gave me the food, and put his arm around my shoulders. And, finally, with a voice that radiated concern for me, _just me_, said, "What's wrong?"


End file.
